I heard back from the team at the surgical center on Tuesday. They'd received the form from my GP and gotten the go ahead from the anesthesiologist. So now the super nice patient advisor there just needs to finalize the good Doc's schedules and then we can book a date. It sound like I'm looking at a day sometime in March, hopefully no later than the beginning of April.

Unfortunately while my brother was here for his super quick visit he figured it out. After my father's comment on the Sunday after he commented me on his wait and him taking the message from the clinic (they just asked that I call) he figured it out. I'm kind of upset about this. Mostly because of his reaction. He wasn't completely against it, instead he wants/told me to get a referal to Ontario so that the government will pay for it but they won't pay for a Lap-Band I told him. His response was "I know, I'm talking about a gastric by-pass."

Is he out of his flipping mind?!?! There is no way that I'm going to have a gastric by-pass. Yes I am overweight, yes I want to have weight-loss surgery, but no I do not want to have my stomach physically cut in half (or less) and re-routed to just a portion of my intestine leaving me unable to properly digest and absorb nutrients. His view probably comes from the fact that his wife's cousin had a GB done about 8 years ago I guess and she has lost the weight. Great for her, she's probably lost 300 pounds. But I have about 70-80 to lose, not 300. I think for him he believes that the GB is better only because the government will pay and therefore saves me money... Uhmm... I can't put a price on my life, health and happiness. Can you? So no. I will not have a GB. I will however continue the process of getting a Lap-Band happily, healthily, and most importantly safely (much much safer than a GB as far as I'm concerned).

That's all for me today. I'm going to crawl into bed with my book, try and get the dog to lay on my feet to keep em warm since Grey's Anatomy was a repeat tonight :(

Lots of Love - Les

So my biggest brother flew in from Toronto this morning to go to a funeral service tomorrow. Despite the terrible circumstance that he's here for it was really great to see him. I think I last saw him in September?? I can't quite remember actually. Either way it is nice to see him. I miss both of my brothers so much sometimes.

Bless his heart though he said "It looks like you lost some weight," if he only knew. Then my father had to open his big fat mouth and say "Oh, have Les and Mom told you what she's going to do?" At which point he was promptly told to mind his own business and that when I was ready I would tell people. Besides I don't even have a surgery date yet. This little incident though gives me some incite that it might be a lot harder than I thought to keep things a secret. It's not that I don't want it to be a secret exactly its just that I don't think that everyone needs to know, there are somethings you keep to yourself and I don't think I need to publicize my weight loss surgery to my friends and family and announce my intentions.

Back to work tomorrow and the regular routine. I made the mistake of checking my work e-mail though and there are 3 e-mails from the boss about experiments he wants me to do. I guess I will be clearing my schedule again this week to do his stuff. But hey if it keeps me in a job I can't complain!

I've been trying to imagine what it will be like to be full after only bites of food. Needless to say, I can't imagine. I had two salads for lunch today cause I was starving and some KD for dinner and I'm still not totally satisfied. I should really be making a better attempt right now to eat healthy. I seem to have adopted this new attitude that since I'm 99.9% sure I'll be having the surgery what I eat from now until then does not really matter. Bad attitude, I know better. So I'll have to work on that.

So have a great week everyone, its almost the end of January can you believe it! Me neither!

Lots of Love - Les

Well, I just had myself a good cry. I missed Grey's Anatomy last night since I went to the Sam Roberts concert. The show was amazing, it reinforced that belief I have in the power of great live music being able to lift you and heal your soul. There is just something about seeing a great musician perform that makes my heart ache with passion. Maybe I was a musician in a past life or something. Anyways my crying comes in with me watching last nights Grey's online. And as usual I got myself so wound up in the plot and characters that I ended up crying. But hey sometimes you just need a good cry to get things you didn't even know you were upset about out of your system.

I dropped off the form at my GP's yesterday for him to fill out. Hopefully he'll do that soon so I can continue progress and book a date. I'm kind of worried about it. I guess because I personally don't have a lot of trust with my GP and I'm not happy with the care I've been receiving.

Despite the start of my week and some super stress at work the rest of the week turned out just fine. I was able to pump out some results for the boss on short notice and learn several new techniques in the process. I got to try out some gel column separation, digestion of plasma and adiponectin, as well as some new antibodies and a multi screening western blotting apparatus... I realize that to the non-science geek lab tech nerds out there that probably means nothing so sorry all!

As I was saying I hit up the Sam Roberts concert last night and if you haven't heard of him I highly suggest checking out his music. He's a great rock musician based out of Montreal. His music is great to just sit back and chill out to. It's catchy with some great lyricism. While I was at the show though I was struck with a huge pang of guilt. There's another Canadian band I adore, Matt Mays & El Torpedo, that I didn't go see in the fall simply because I didn't want to go alone. I need to start pushing myself out of my comfort zone more often. It's one of those confidence type issues where I'm nervous to do things without friends. There was absolutely no other reason for me not to go to that show, tickets were only $20. If I had gone I'm sure I would have had an awesome time. So I've got to work on that, keep telling myself that I don't need to have a buddy around to do everything. So I decided that if Matt heads back into Peg city this year, regardless if I can find someone to go with me I will go. I won't miss him for something like that again. Didn't I say earlier that I had to stop spending so much money on concerts though? What's wrong with me? It's a sick obsessive compulsion. So lets try to make a better resolution. No big ticket concerts. Smaller venues with tickets no more than $50. I will not buy anymore $300 tickets (Elton John anyone?!?!) and if I must absolutely see that artist I will settle for the cheaper ticket even though it won't be floor :( It hurts to say but I need to set my priorities right. Lap-Band... Concerts... Lap-Band... Concerts.... LAP-BAND!!! DUH!

Alright all I leave you with my Music of the Moment: Sam Roberts Band - We Were Born in a Flame

Lots of Love - Les

So I met with the surgeon today... Dr. Andrew. He was really great. All of my questions were answered and more. Having my Mom with me there was a great idea since she asked things I hadn't thought of. She also said later that she was happy she went so that she saw who exactly would be operating on her "baby girl." She felt relieved to see what kind of a person it was and to learn that he is also a practicing surgeon at one of the hospitals in the city and that the lap-band job is not his primary focus (I guess that makes him a good surgeon in her eyes?)
Dr. Andrew went over my medical history, my weight loss attempts and then popped me on the scale (which was a scary four pounds meaner than mine and my GP's) and then prodded my belly for a bit. It was interesting he said that the way I carry my weight would actually make it easier for them to perform the operation. Right now I need to get my GP to fill out a form and return it to them. From there we can look at booking a surgery date. Once its booked its a waiting game except that I will have to do the dreaded Optifast for two weeks prior to surgery. Interesting cause I thought that I had heard of every diet product out there and had never heard of Optifast until I started reading the lap-band blogs. I sincerely hope that it isn't as terrible as everyone makes it out to be.
In other news... I have my very first follower! Hi Tracey! I look forward to keeping in contact with you and learning from your blog also as I continue along this path.
As of today I am for sure a go ahead with the surgery. Just need to tie up some loose ends (Dr's forms and money) and book. Hopefully within the next 6 weeks I myself will be a "bandit".
Lots of Love - Les

And what a Monday it was. You know how you hate Mondays and always dread how they just seem to keep happening. Whether it's back to work or long-standing appointments everyone has something they hate about Mondays but at the end of the day it usually doesn't turn out nearly as bad as you seem to think it should be. Most of the time. I today had a true Monday where everything was turned upside down and topsy turvy and reminded me that sometimes I don't love my job. I do for the most part love my job and have it scheduled and worked out to a tee that keeps me sane. That is until the boss shows up monday morning in his own state of panic because there is a grant due in two weeks and experiments must be finished this week and whatever work and experiments I had planned need to be shuffled off for another time. I love consistency. I thrive on organization and planning so needless to say this morning when this happened I entered this zone of complete anxiety and therefore stupidity. All of a sudden the things I am so good at I can not even comprehend. I walked back into the lab with what I'm sure was a look of sheer terror on my face and attempted to do some calculations but ended up staring at a blank piece of paper, pencil in hand until one of the graduate students woke me out of my panic coma and got me a cup of tea.
Once I got past all of this, the day was fine. It did however remind me that no amount of organization and preparation will ever keep me from experiencing a true Monday.
And on more lap band related news tomorrow is my consultation! I decided instead of trying to rush back and forth from work I would just use my overtime hours to cover the whole day. So my appointment is at one o'clock, my Mom is going with me for support and act as an extra set of ears as well as another "interogator" acting in my best interest.

Lots of posts for one day I know. To keep me motivated some of the women we see all the time I find to be very beautiful and aspire to have just one ounce of their charm. And I apparently seem to think that all women named Kate or Katherine are beautiful... strange.